Change

I'm still sleeping in the spare room - and wow do I feel better! I did think about going back at the weekend, but honestly, when he got up three times in an hour to pee, I thought, no, I can't stand this. I've been sleeping so well, all wrapped up and dreaming of my lovely men. Only thing better would be if one was actually here wouldn't it?

Waiting to hear from the bm about thursday. Not holding my breath though, honestly. Bloody men! Obviously not thinking of me, sat here like a crazed nun!! I've not had sex since August and the swimmer - mind you, that kept me going for a while didn't it?? Could definitely use it though.

I was feeling really down yesterday - you know what, it's Sundays isn't it? I've got to avoid them at all costs. How do I do that?? Well, I could meet a man - I could get really busy. Must think of something though. It was bad and I haven't really got past it all day. Made me wonder if I wasn't risking my health sticking it out though. Still, what better excuse to leave - I've had a breakdown because of you!! Oh, the guilt - oh the possibilities. xxxx